• Emma Chapman Counselling

Revolutionary Resolutions

New Year's resolutions often re-enforce deep help beliefs that we aren't good enough. In a world that makes money out of our insecurities, let's start a revolution and try something different.

Here are 3 ways that we can learn to love and accept ourselves, just as we are in 2019.

1. Stop comparing yourself to others.

Everybody has a different starting place, so comparing where you are, or what you have to others is a futile and self-destructive act. So instead of planning how you can get what others appear to have, how about looking at how far you have come?

Photo by Artem Bali on Unsplash

2. Allow yourself time to feel what you feel.

Feelings aren't a choice, they are an emotional reaction to the things that the world throws at us. We can spend such a lot of time and energy trying to avoid them, deny them or change them. So this year don't 'Be more Positive'. Allow yourself your feelings, take time to feel them and to understand them without self-judgement. By doing this we move on naturally, without wasting all that energy on fighting them!

Photo by Nik Shuliahin on Unsplash

3. Focus on the things you like about yourself.

Instead of the usual list of things we want to change about ourselves, make a list of the things that you wouldn't change. This isn't always an easy thing to do, but try seeing yourself through the eyes of others. What would your friends, your children, your partner or your colleagues say they liked about you? Write them down to hold on to them, stick them on your mirror and aim to add more to the list this year. This isn't about changing, it's about learning to recognise and love yourself just as you are.

Photo by Hannah Olinger on Unsplash

Liking yourself isn't vanity, it's essential in a world that spends all of it's energy trying to sell us face cream because we look old. This is just one of the millions of examples of the way in which the modern world profits from selling us discontent. We don't need the cream, embrace the wrinkles and start a revolution of self in 2019!

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